"Sperechen Sie Deutsch ?"

As soon as I received my scholarship I was bombarded with the following question ... "Do you know German?" To which I answered "No," trying to show a brave face and hoping they would think me brave and not crazy. Since then I'm bombarded with "Sperechen Sie Deutsch?" To which I respond "Ya, Ich kann eine bisschen Deutsch sprechen," hoping that they think of me as brave and not crazy. Not nearly three months into my exchange I myself have questioned if the line between crazy and brave is drawn to the left or right of my decision making.  

I don't know how learning a language through immersion really works; it's one of those things that the more you think about it the less you understand. I know I'm learning more everyday but I don't know exactly how. I look up words in my dictionary but those words are usually the ones I forget. I learn proper sentence structure but usually say it a different way anyways. Yet I'm still learning. As I sat in class the other day I realized that I understood everything the teacher was saying, not every word but the entire meaning was there ... I've come so far from understanding just words and never the entire meaning . It’s a magical feeling when you’re able to start figuring out things out of context and realize how far you've come in terms of language. I'm beyond proud of myself today and I deserve to be.

 Learning a language through immersion has been one of the hardest things I've had to do in my life and although I still have a full exchange with embarrassing language moments ahead of me the worse is over. The days of not understanding anything at all are gone, the days of staring blankly when asked trivial questions those are gone.  I still don't know a great deal but I know enough where I can at least attempt to explain what I think, what I need, and what I want. I can also understand so much more so so so much more!

I obviously have not gotten to this level all by myself, the people I have to thank are as great and numerous as the milestones I've reached in the language. My host family has been incredibly helpful; their persistence in speaking German with me has been invaluable. From the very beginning they've mastered speaking to me in German while understanding when English was a better option. Today I can proudly say that English is almost never the better option that has been replaced with kindergarten level explanations in German when things get tough, that to they have mastered.

My teachers have been more likely to speak to me in anything other than German but soon understood that I would much rather they speak in German, none of them speaks to me in English or Spanish anymore unless it's directly related to class. The only exception is my French teacher who do to my level of confusion in that class switching back and forth between foreign language tends to speak to me in French just as often as she does in German.

My classmates all know English and sometimes automatically speak to me in English but have done that less and less. More than anyone else I appreciate it when they slow down to speak or explain something to me since I know for them it really is so much easier to just say it in English .

Overall what I've found is that everyone is genuinely very supportive of me as I struggle to learn the language and that really makes it all worth it. The moments when people help me are more plentiful than the moments I feel frustrated by the language and that balance has made all the difference. Every time someone comments on my progress I beam and it reminds me to keep getting better. As I sat in Spanish the other day writing the assignment in German (everyone else had to do it in Spanish)  my teacher looked over and asked to correct it, I negated that saying it was really bad (which it was I wasn't putting much effort into it ), then the kid next to me turned and said ... you know we don't expect your German to be perfect. He was simply stating a fact nothing special but being reminded that I didn't have to be perfect right away made my day. A similar thing happened in English, as I think I said something in German or anyhow we were commenting on my German when my friend laughed, I pretended to be hurt, when he jokingly said "okay it's true your German is very funny but that's why it will get better." Again it was just a fact ... but hearing it from someone else made my day.

All the support has helped tremendously but I haven't gotten where I am without consciously deciding to do things the hard way. I put myself out there and speak German even when it's bad , when I'm tired I take a deep breath and keep at it . The longer I'm here the easier it has become to speak it without over thinking every sentence. I do all my Spanish assignments in German and take all tests that way as well even though I don't have to. I've started carrying a small notebook with me I write all the vocabulary from all of my classes their and even when I know what the word means I write the German one next to it to look back on. You won’t ever find me without a German-English dictionary it goes everywhere I go and I use it daily. Before putting something in Google Translate I go word for word and see how much I can decipher myself, goggle translate is only a backup. All these things are hard to do and require time and effort. There is one thing though that I enjoy doing to better my German ... whenever someone speaks to me in another language I always answer in German or with a smile say "Ich habe alles meine Englisch/Spanisch vergessen kannst du auf Deutsch sprechen bitte?" I've forgotten my entire English/Spanish can you speak in German please? The looks on peoples face are priceless and I usually get a laugh as well.

Language Milestones Have Included (but are not limited to ) ...

• Ordering and buying things by myself 
• Taking a Biology Klasure in German (I was allowed to write in English though) 
• Having a conversation over an hour long with my Betreuer all in German 
• Forgetting in what language things were said 
• Answering questions in German in English class (this is usually very funny but I figure if they can speak in English I can speak in German!)
• Having a phone conversation in German (albeit short and simple) 
• Speaking to my American friend in school in German (also hilarious) 
• Dinner party Bavarian accents Polish accents galore and yes I had a conversation
• Explaining the US elections at above mentioned dinner party (not eloquently and with a little help with words but still ) 
• Being told that my English had gotten significantly worse, bittersweet but the fact that it means I've been focused on German makes it worth it 

It's been three months and it hasn't been easy and yes although I've learned a lot my German still sucks but there isn't many things in this world as rewarding as learning a new language the way I've done it !

**for authenticity no German in this post was spell checked or over analyzed just written how I would say it in the moment

The effect of learning so much so fast !